Still not ready

since this is kind of how I'm feeling these days, I'm not sure I'm ready to talk about it critically yet. I don't like to use this blog as my bitchfest (that's what friends are for!), you don't need to hear my whining. Things aren't even going with the new guy. It's really sad too, I kind of got swept up in him. I feel like I did in middle school and liked a boy, its incredibly unnerving. Until I can think about it without hyperventilating and wanting to key his car, ham his house and cry all at the same time I don't want to touch this subject. My sex drive is nil since I can only think about him, and I don't even feel comfortable letting him touch me in my fantasies. Sorry for the sex blog without any sex bloggin'
I'll be back soon, I hate being this lame, which makes it worse, I get into this spiral of self hatred BUT I will pull out of it, there is only so much self loathing I can take.