Moving on: training wheels domination

So there’s a new boy in my life. I don’t know where this one will go. He’s way too nice for me, since I do not do well with overt nice-ness. I don’t know, is it always bad to think: “is there something else out there?” Will that ever go away? But like all my friends have told me, I deserve someone nice someone to dote on me and do all those things I rarely ever get since I date emotionally stunted assholes. The thing is; do I want someone nice? But that’s another post. I mean, don’t get me wrong I like being complimented, but it has to be rare so it means something. Does that make sense? He lacks some sort of edge I feel, some sort of I must conquer you edge that I like to have (the douche bag gene?). I really enjoy the chase, my fav is the chase and then the win, and so having it already locked down just is difficult for me. Well not really, its hard to describe, I have my stable, there really is no chase with them, but they are not truly mine. My grasp is tenuous at best. I’m having a hard time expressing my discomfort and my lack of 100% sexual arousal, but I’ll get there I want to be able to explain it so I can conquer it. I just think that there is a side of him that is not 100% willing to step off any precipice out of not fear but complacency, and I am not a complacent person. I think that’s what it is. I prefer to be the less manic person, not the most. This requires further examination

Ok so back to the reason I’m writing:
So this new boy we shall call him MJ, he knows that I have dominant tendencies but has never walked down this path. He actually has some reservations 1- about women in general, 2- about women who want to tie men up. He had a friend who met this girl at a bar and she convinced him to let her tie him up. She anally raped him (mind you this is from him the day after, who knows what was consensual and what was buyer’s remorse) and left him tied to his bed to be found and ultimately humiliated by his military supervisor. With a story like that, and knowing his quiet ways, I can see his hesitation.
And like Marcelle’s Bay Area Boy, this one is super green. He is really quiet and had a very oppressive upbringing, so he kind of shied away from girls. He didn’t lose his virginity until he was 22 and had never had a woman swallow his come until me, which is downright wrong. BUT like I said, I’m a newbie too, two newbie’s…that’s like a high school virginity story right there and that’s too awkward to do, ever!
I digress, so I am trying to slowly work him into things I’m into. I like domination and control more than hitting (well the hitting comes, but it needs to be when I’m in the mood and since he’s so fresh and dopey already over me, I can’t see myself hitting him anytime soon, until I know he will be ok with something like that). So I thought I would try something new, and if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know.
So I thought the best way was to slowly get him into this control thing. So we played a little game, and it was HAWT. He had to tell me step by step what he was doing to me as he did it, if he stopped, I would remove his hand and push him away a little (later on this will be amended to something harder like a slap…that already sounds delicious) but you have to walk before you can crawl, right? The downsides to this, he can’t go down on me, keeping his mouth busy talking has its disadvantages, but it also is pretty fun. I get to hear him actually think through what he’s going to do which makes him think through it too! Hearing it while it’s happening, made me concentrate more on the exact location that he was touching, so if he said he was going to lightly touch my nipple, my heart would race and I would concentrate on that nipple. Now take that step-by-step until his mouth was on my nipple (if he wanted to do something else, he would have to remove his mouth to tell me) so all of foreplay until my orgasm was basically scripted. I enjoyed it thoroughly.
Example: I’m going to run one finger gently on the side of your clit, you’re so soft and wet, I’m not going to stick one finger in, slowing fucking you, now adding another…etc

You can see how this is a turn on, and especially since when he would get too carried away, he would stop saying what he was doing, mind you, it was hard making him stop, but prolonging it for both of us was pretty dam fun. And this was not limited to just “down there” action (I need to get more comfortable talking about my girl parts)
I thought that was a good “training wheels” sort of entrance, and it turned me on, so that’s good.
I mean, the first week worth of make outs were fun and all, but the regular bump and grind (literally) begins to lose their luster, I was getting bored. And this totally sparked things up again.

Any thoughts on more ways to ease him into this?
I told him that he can say no at anytime and if he has no interest in anything to let me know.


Quick aside
I want to share this IM convo that makes me happy

Talking about nothing in particular
MJ: fine, you win, I suck
M Leah: you don’t suck
MJ: I do if you ask

The force is strong with this one….